My Spouse Has Dementia

For a person with Alzheimer's or other form of dementia, wandering can be dangerous. If that person isn't found within 24 hours, the chances that he or she will suffer serious injury, even death, increase dramatically. The family dementia caregiver will likely experience serious stress until the loved one is found. According to the Alzheimer's Association 6 in 10 people with demen

Your spouse has Alzheimer's. You know he - or she - shouldn't be driving. When you bring up the subject, you hear some version of, "That's ridiculous! I know how to drive a car." He might be right. He might still know how to drive a car. The problem is that he shouldn't be driving a car. No, this isn't a simple matter of semantics. Your spouse may still have the muscle memory to

Mary Lou Falcone became a caregiver when her father had a massive stroke. She was 10 years old. The experience prepared her for the day, many years later, when her husband, illustrator and 1950s rocker Nicky Zann, was diagnosed with Lewy Body Dementia (LBD). In her memoir, I Didn't See It Coming: Scenes of Love, Loss, and Lewy Body Dementia, Falcone talks about what it was like to

Sometimes, the dreams we carry inspire us. Then life changes, especially if your spouse has dementia. Now, those same dreams weigh us down… and we have to let go. Advertisements for some memory care facilities and some dementia service agencies don’t help. I find those ads insulting. You’ve read the message in blogs and brochures. Depending on where you and your spouse are

This is a cautionary tale about a dear friend, a family caregiver who died first. She was in her mid-70s, a few weeks younger than I am. In mid-April, she had a stroke. She died mid-July, just as I faced the one-year milestone of my husband's death from Alzheimer's. Her death emphasized the reality of caregiver stress and the importance of caregiver support. You may not have time

My husband died last summer. He had Alzheimer's. I’ve experienced a lot of “firsts” without him: his birthday, my birthday, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, and most recently, Valentine’s Day. Some of those days passed without incident. Others…not so much. It's March. I survived the first holiday season alone. I know there is no end-point to grief. We careg

Not feeling festive? No surprise. For those of us caring for a spouse with Alzheimer's or other form of dementia, December can be a cruel month. While much of the world is joyful. We're sad. It's part of the journey we're on. Today is the Winter Solstice. Light is returning to the Northern Hemisphere. In ancient Rome, this marked a time to celebrate and give gifts. The "wow" gift w

Are you caring for a spouse with Alzheimer's? You need to know that hope, like optimism, can strengthen your resilience or distort your reality. Hope can also be the key to your surivival. My husband died four months ago. In caring for him, I journeyed from confusion to determination, from anger to cynicism, from defiance to acceptance. I shunned hope. I grasped for hope. Only whe

When tragedy reshapes your life, having a supportive community is key to your survival. Since my husband died of Alzheimer's three months ago, I've been in a cave of sorts, rarely leaving the house. My neighbors drew me back into the world of the living - with a tree. For family dementia caregivers, grief and guilt can become interwined. This episode includes a simple, self-care r