Cabot Cove Confidential

Should you bring a wind machine to your new town? What’s your stance on stranger foot rubs? Most obvious wig award? Is Rob Zombie an MSW fan? Why would a stealth ninja / fake witch leave both finger prints AND a flower pedal signature? And is it weird that CSI:CC spun off from a show that didn’t premiere for nearly a decade?

What kind of charm does Geoffrey possess? Is bolo on a Bolo the new high fashion or just a symptom of self-sent roses? How is Barry going to handle finding out that the stage maintenance was a ruse to smoke out the killer? And is our terrible Hulk Hogan impersonation more dead than the ballerinas who dance the lead in this show?

Can Damien say Lermentov? What are Jennie's thought on horse ownership? Does Michael's story match his actions? How fast can you read an entire mystery novel? And what would you even call someone who owns horses?

Who is Chuckles Wryly? Can you tell a railroad tie from a railroad spike, and which is worse for the hairline? Is Phil Arkham the most likable villain or just a man speaking truth to power? Would you forgive a beloved family pet over a beloved family member? And did MSW steal the seat position clue from a classic Pauly Shore film?

Was Eddie ever majoring in anything besides bus station cons and young girlfriends? Is crossing Diesel and Angel a good idea? Would Hulk Hogan be better as JB or as Michelle Tanner? Are compacts still a thing? And what are you going to do when Pastamania runs wild on you?

How short a trip is too short for a private jet flight? How old is Scott? Why are polo helmets so goofy? How young is Scott? And is Dane the worst at buisness, polo, blackmail or all three?

Would you watch a knot tying competition show? Have you been a good boy? Why didn't they just do a cold case episode? What's Mothman's glute routine? And how did Damien feel about this one?

What is Linda's level of employment? Why is auerbach such a jerk? Is Damien's meta old man rant the meta old man rant to end them all? And do we believe that Michael didn't know those computers were stolen?

How many times is Pat Hingle going to play this same dude? Are convertibles a genetic Metzger trait? Is Wayne pretty much the pinnacle catch in Cabot Cove? And why does Damien keep yelling, ‘full of bees!’?

How many gigawatts does it take to run a tv? Is Girard the worst? Is Brent the weirdest? And how loud is that hotub?