Oct 08 2023 4 mins
As you read/listen, I invite you not to take my words as truth, but to trust your own interpretation of them. Feel free to share with me in the comments your own experiences and realisations, because all of our unique ways of seeing are valid.
In a world where we’re told to look for answers through other people, through systems, through what your best friend said, your parents told you growing up or the general societal conventions of the times we live in, it can be seriously scary to trust yourself, to trust the wisdom that resides within you, that resides within all of us.
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To me, the truth that flows through each of us is unique. The image I always get is of a puzzle, where we are all a unique piece of that puzzle, and it’s in being that unique piece that we can begin to see, understand and function as a whole. This is when we stop seeing ourselves as separate, and at the same time, see the value in our differences.
At the same time, it’s important to refer to the other pieces in the puzzle in order to determine exactly where one piece fits, just as it’s equally important to refer to the truths that others share with us, to connect, refine, gain a deeper understanding and deeper clarity when remembering our own wisdom. Both are needed.
Based on my experience, it’s when we make what is outside of us (the words, actions, dreams, beliefs etc. of others) as our source or destination, that we can find ourselves in conflict with ourselves because we’re overriding our own wisdom. We’re trying hard to be a different piece of the puzzle, or reject the existence of the puzzle entirely.
This has been a very subtle realisation in my own life, where decisions have arose from the wisdom of others, rather than my own. Why do we do this? There’s many reasons, for me it was a need to prove myself, thinking that what I had to offer wasn’t enough. I’d worked with many coaches and therapists throughout my life that I unconsciously had outsourced my wisdom. Rather than listen to their words with curiosity, with the ability to not take on what I felt wasn’t for me to hear, I made their words my own, I became a copy of their puzzle piece rather than my own, I moulded myself to be seen as, what I thought, would be more acceptable in their eyes. The funny thing was, the way back wasn’t trying to fix or change how I felt, but in allowing myself to fully go into all of the pain that I felt from forgetting and neglecting my own wisdom. The pain I felt from trying to be someone else other than all that I am and the gifts that arise from my unique ways of seeing the world.
If something in you resonates with this, I can only speak from my experience and say that whilst it’s important to surround yourself with the guidance and space of those that you trust, do this on the foundations of first learning about who you uniquely are. Know the intricacies and the value of your puzzle piece. Use these foundations to explore the world with curiosity, and continually return to what’s inside to determine what’s for you and what isn’t. Get to know the unique way your body, mind, heart and gut speak to you. Understand your unique cycles of both human and spirit. Use nature as your first reference point. Practice and know that whatever you’re feeling and experiencing right now is okay. There is no destination in life except to return back to where we came from, so in my eyes, the greatest gift we can offer to ourselves is to begin to remember and practice trusting the way that we want to experience each moment that we receive in this beautiful life.
With love,
Emma
Photo by Vardan Papikyan on Unsplash
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