Seeking Out Rejection; Fletcher Ellingson


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Sep 12 2024 27 mins   4

Fletcher Ellingson is experienced at deliberately seeking out rejection as a way to strengthen his mindset. He is a speaker, coach, and author of the best-selling book The Practice of Feeling Good. Using a combination of science and psychology, he helps his clients break free from financial struggle, being overwhelmed, and persistent worry so they can spend more time doing what they love, contributing to their families, and impacting their communities. Fletcher also hosts a regional weekly TV show, is a regular contributing columnist, and a professional magician.



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Most Influential Person
  • My mom / Eckhart Tolle / Michael Singer


Effect On Emotions

  • Mindfulness helps me slow down by allowing me to become more aware of my thoughts. I believe that much of our thinking is automatic, happening without our permission, consent, or approval.

  • This automatic thinking often generates emotions aligned with those thoughts. By pausing and taking a moment to notice my thinking, I practice discerning whether it's truly my thoughts or just an automatic response.

  • More often than not, it’s the latter. This awareness then gives me the opportunity to ask myself what I actually want to believe about the situation and what meaning I want to assign to it.

  • From there, I can approach the situation with curiosity, which in turn helps me become calmer and more creative in my response.



Thoughts On Breathing

  • Breathing is definitely one of the pillars of feeling good. We often take it for granted because it happens automatically, yet it's essential to life.

  • I'm a strong advocate for being intentional about breathing and have done various breathing exercises, including Wim Hof training and other fun workshops.

  • Every day, I make a point to be aware of my breath, especially in the mornings when I go to the lake. While throwing a stick for my dog and watching the sunrise, I also focus on my breathing.

  • It feels great to be mindful of my breath with intention.


Bullying Story
  • In high school, I was frequently bullied and constantly on edge. One day, overwhelmed by my emotions and the recent loss of my father, I verbally lashed out at a bully in class, and afterward, I never saw him again.

  • Last year, I reached out to apologize for my harshness, only for him to admit he didn’t even remember the incident.

  • This resolution finally brought me peace after decades of feeling guilty.



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