As Marla Gibbs (look her up, Boomer. Did I get that right?) once said, “there’s no place like home!” And she was obviously singing about Skokie, Illinois - home of a cookie cutter AMC Movie Palace so glorious, it rivals only Chicago’s famous Esquire Theater, now home to a shuttered Dallas-based steak chain. (#Progress)
Usually, Tony and T.J. only go on post-Bears game movie dates when it involves seeing the latest Marvel sequel to a Marvel sequel. (Turn up the volume on those explosions, projector man!) But a special field trip was made after a SEASON-TURNING BEARS WIN, to go see the limited, first ever theatrical release of Paul McCartney’s “One Hand Clapping”. Is the film better on the big screen than tucked away on the “Band On The Run” Archive Collection DVD? Does the music rock even harder in the theater? What’s the deal with popcorn prices these days, Obama? Tony and T.J. ask these salient and Soily questions, and also ponder from the backyard (of the theater):
📚😭 Is the Half Price Books in Skokie, IL this generation’s Tower Records? And if it is, is society in more trouble than we previously ever imagined?
🍿💩 Did “The Popcorn Kid”, the 1987 CBS flop about teens working in a movie theater, that T.J. used to videotape for some weirdo reason, ever have an episode about cleaning human feces from an exterior wall?
🍔🤮 (Angry Chicago Guy): “How come woke Tony don’t ever get no Ohio-based Red Robin Gourmet Burgers on Hulu/FX’s “The Bear”? Some Chicagoan, NOT!” (He laughs a little too hard at his own use of “NOT”, and begins to cough up Old Style from acid reflux. He vomits on his worn shoes. It’s quite sad, actually. His son doesn’t even call him anymore on Christmas; and after the hell he went through as a kid, damn right he doesn’t. And yet, this man needs help - especially after this White Sox season - and y’all laugh? Like your life is perfect? What do you get out of this abject cruelty? Maybe that’s a better question.)
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