Managing Two Hats - The Challenges of Coaching Your Own Child


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Mar 31 2025 20 mins   1

Navigating the Dual Role: Parent and Coach

In this episode of Confident Calm Clutch Car Ride Conversations, host Valerie Alston discusses the unique challenges of having a parent as a coach with her father, who coached her in softball. They explore the balance between supportive parenting and effective coaching, the importance of not placing limits on young athletes, and the value of perseverance and hard work. This episode is filled with real-life experiences and practical wisdom for sports parents, coaches, and athletes aiming to build stronger relationships and lifelong skills. The discussion also includes tips on handling mistakes and fostering an environment where young athletes can thrive. Tune in for an insightful conversation that can shift perspectives on success, effort, and potential in sports.

00:00 Introduction: The Parent-Coach Dynamic

01:23 Balancing Roles: Parent vs. Coach

03:03 Challenges and Strategies in Coaching Your Own Child

04:09 Encouraging Potential Without Limits

05:14 The Importance of Fair Play and Hard Work

08:37 Balancing Support and Pressure

12:08 Handling Mistakes and Building Resilience

16:55 Interactive Discussion Questions

19:33 Conclusion and Final Thoughts


Discussion questions:

  1. What does it mean to “earn your spot” on a team? How does it feel when someone gets a position because of hard work versus because of who they are (like being the coach's kid)?
  2. When is it helpful to be pushed—and when is it too much? Can you think of a time when a parent or coach pushed you in a way that helped? Or a time when it felt overwhelming?
  3. How do you bounce back after a mistake in a game? What kind of support do you need in those moments—coaching, space, encouragement?
  4. What’s one position or role on a team that you’re curious about or want to try, even if it’s not your usual spot? How could you start working toward being ready for that challenge?

Thanks for joining me on Confident, Calm, and Clutch Car Ride Conversations! If you found this episode helpful, please subscribe to the podcast so you never miss a moment. Share it with other parents or coaches who could use a little extra inspiration on the go.

👉 for weekly tips, mindset shifts, and conversations that help you and your athlete stay confident, calm, and clutch—no matter the scoreboard subscribe to me newsletter at www.confidentcalmclutch.com/newsletter

For more specific tips on being and effective youth sport coach, buy my book "How to Teach Mental Skills to Athletes" https://amzn.to/45MSgWU


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