Dec 12 2012
It’s game night here at the Movie Dump and Nic brought along one of his all time favorites, “Battleship.” Aw yes the good old class board game that pits man against misunderstood alien in the epic aquatic battle that can only be matched by the late great H.G. Wells’ “The War of the World.” Only a game this powerful can withstand the sheer awesomeness of a Vampire, a sadomasochistic R&B singer, and the leader of the League of Assassins… who is also a fother mucking JEDI! So B4 you listen to this review C2 it that you are fully ready for the ass kicking tsunami of greatness that is “Battleship.”
Plot
NASA discovers an extrasolar planet, called Planet-G by humans, with conditions similar to Earth and transmits a powerful signal from a communications array in Hawaii. Meanwhile slacker Alex Hopper gets arrested while attempting to impress Samantha Shane, daughter of U.S. Pacific Fleet commander Admiral Terrance Shane. Stone Hopper, Alex’s older brother and a Commander under Terrance, is infuriated at Alex’s lack of motivation and forces Alex to join him in the U.S. Navy. By 2012, Alex is a lieutenant aboard the Arleigh Burke class destroyer USS John Paul Jones, while Stone is the commanding officer of USS Sampson. 
Alex is in a relationship with Samantha and due to disciplinary problems is in danger of being discharged from the Navy. Their ships, along with others from around the world, are taking part in the biennial Rim of the Pacific Exercise (RIMPAC) in Hawaii.
During the training exercise five alien spacecraft arrive in response to the NASA signal. Their communications ship crashes in Hong Kong, while four others land in the water near Hawaii. The Chinese determine the craft uses an element not known on the Periodic table, suggesting they come from either a different part of the galaxy, or another galaxy altogether.
Sampson, John Paul Jones, and theJMSDF Kongō class destroyer Myōkō investigate, but are trapped when the alien mothership erects a tower that creates a force fieldover and around the Hawaiian islands having an altitude of three hundred thousand feet and a depth of two nautical miles. After shots are fired the aliens destroy Sampson and Myōkō, and damage John Paul Jones, killing the commanding and executive officers. Alex takes command as the most senior officer left on the ship, while also learning that Stone was killed on the Sampson. The John Paul Jones recovers survivors from Myōkō, including Captain Nagata, whom Alex is in a rivalry with.
Meanwhile the aliens have taken over the communications array on O’ahu. Nearby, Samantha, a physiotherapist, is accompanying retired U.S. Army veteran and double amputee Mick Canales on a hike to help him adapt to his prosthetic legs. They meet scientist Cal Zapata, who is fleeing from the array. Zapata informs them that the aliens are likely planning to bounce a signal to their home planet offNASA’s Project Beacon satellite, but the satellite will not be in range for another five hours. Zapata then agrees to retrieve a radio that will allow Samantha and Mick to contact the John Paul Jones and relay this information.
Back on the John Paul Jones, the crew faces difficulty because the alien force field has disabled radar functions. Nagata suggests using the tsunami warning buoys around Hawaii to track the aliens, and as their ship monitors the NOAA buoy technology the surge of the advancing alien ships generates detectable wave action. During a night battle, the aliens and the humans exchange shots in a manner reminiscent of the “Battleship” board game.
The John Paul Jones sinks two alien ships but is unable to hit the third. Alex had learned from crew mate Jimmy Ord that the aliens were sensitive to sunlight after they had captured one, and decides to lure the third alien vessel close to shore, where he and Nagata shoot out its bridge windows as the sunrise blinds the aliens. In the ensuing battle, both ships are destroyed.
Fearing the aliens are contacting a larger invasion fleet, Alex needs to destroy the alien mothership and tower next. But since his ship has been destroyed the survivors are forced to return to base and acquire the only remaining naval vessel, the USS Missouri. Although decommissioned and turned into a museum ship, they are able to reactivate it with the aid of the retired veterans preserving her. 
The battleship evades the alien ship’s gunfire and destroys the force field it was maintaining. Alex uses the last shell to destroy the communications array on the island, leaving the Missouri defenseless. However, with the force field barrier down, jet fighters from the RIMPAC fleet arrive and eliminate the last alien vessel’s sole remaining cannon, destroying the vessel. A ceremony is held to honor the Navy personnel and Alex accepts both a posthumous Navy Cross on his brother’s behalf and a Silver Star for his own actions, as well as a promotion to the rank of Lieutenant commander.
After the ceremony, Alex asks Admiral Shane for his daughter’s hand in marriage. The Admiral initially refuses but invites Alex to lunch to discuss the matter.
A post-credits scene in Scotland shows three schoolchildren and a handyman running off in terror as an alien hand reaches out of an object they have just broken open.