The Subtle Attack of Shame on Spirituality | An Interview with James Willhite


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Jan 18 2025 48 mins   70

James Willhite is an experiential therapist, coach, and consultant. He previously worked for 20 years in finance and sales management where he found a passion for speaking and coaching, then decided to switch careers and earned a Master’s in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Lamar University. With Steven Shields he co-founded Accepted, a collection of exclusively trained experiential guide who lead individuals, families, groups, and corporations to maximize their health and connection.


James also serves on the board of three non-profit organizations (Unashamed Unafraid, A Warrior Heart, and Heart of a Woman) and firmly believes that as we work to remove the obstacles and barriers of trauma, our true and divine identity will be uncovered at our core. He loves spending time with his wife, Kristy and with his four children.


James Willhite


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Highlights


James talks about the complexities of shame, particularly in the context of spirituality and personal growth. Wilhite addresses issues like anxiety, depression, addiction, and trauma in his practice. He highlights the subtle yet pervasive nature of shame, often overlooked in therapeutic settings, and how it can lead individuals to hide from God and themselves.


The discussion delves into the biblical story of Adam and Eve, exploring how shame was introduced into the human experience and how it continues to affect individuals today. Wilhite explains that shame is a primary weapon used by the adversary to create distance between individuals and God, leading to feelings of inadequacy and the need to seek validation from others rather than from the divine. He emphasizes the importance of recognizing and naming shame to break free from its grip, encouraging listeners to understand their true identity as children of God.


Throughout the episode, Wilhite offers practical advice for church leaders and individuals alike, urging them to embrace the inevitability of pain, work, and uncertainty in life as opportunities for growth rather than as punishments. He underscores the significance of leaning into God’s goodness and trusting in His promises, even amidst struggles. The conversation culminates in a powerful reminder that healing is possible through understanding one’s identity and the nature of God, ultimately inviting listeners to embark on their own “shame adventure” to foster healing and connection.


03:30 – Understanding Shame in Therapy

04:50 – Common Issues in Therapy Post-COVID

06:30 – The Role of Trauma in Therapy

08:00 – Experiential Therapy vs. Talk Therapy

09:30 – Importance of Finding the Right Therapist

10:50 – The Adam and Eve Story and Shame

12:30 – The Subtlety of Shame

14:00 – Hiding from God and Its Consequences

16:30 – The Cycle of Perfectionism and Shame

18:00 – Recognizing Shame in Leadership

19:30 – God’s Nature and Our Identity

21:00 – The Importance of Self-Compassion

22:30 – The Journey of Healing from Shame

24:00 – God’s Response to Adam and Eve

26:00 – Misinterpretation of God’s Blessings

28:00 – Embracing Pain and Work as Inevitable

30:00 – Trusting God Amidst Uncertainty

32:00 – The Role of Pain in Growth

34:00 – Feeling to Heal: The Process of Therapy

36:00 – Allowing Ourselves to Feel Emotions

38:00 – Conclusion and Final Thoughts on Healing


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