Moonies Never Say Die Hard!

It's been a hell of a season two—David's brother, Maddie's parents, Agnes almost certainly still keeping a baby that doesn't belong to her. Casinos in Buenos Aires, flashbacks to the 1940s, trips to the, um, mall. Whoopi Goldberg! Orson Welles! Cousin Larry from "Perfect Strangers"! Magical leprechauns, massive Rolodexes, multiple fourth-wall breaks. Funer

When an escort’s mob-connected client mumbles upcoming hits in his sleep, she tells David, who in turn uses the intel to catch the killers. Or stop them before they commit the crime, which is sort of like the first draft of “Minority Report” minus eye-replacement surgery. Soon David is the toast of the town, beloved by the police, the mayor, and the entire city of LA. In fact

David is on the lam! When an elderly man frames David for his murder (to avoid his death being labeled a suicide and invalidate his life insurance because, uh, comedy), David does what every fugitive from the law would do if they were nine-years-old. He hides at his friend’s house. Then he hides at his friend’s place of work. Then he probably hides in a toy store or wherever th

As the great John Mayer said, “Fathers be good to your daughters. Daughters <mumble> <mumble>.” Maddie learns this first hand as she is faced with the question of whether her father and her mother’s husband are the same person. Corporeally? The answer is yes. More morally? That answer is no. Poppa Hayes is having an affair. The mother suspects it. Maddie denies it

Revenge is a dish best served cold—and lifeless—when a magician swears to kill his wife from beyond the grave, which is either a remarkable feat or stunning case of poor time management. But when the magician dies mid-act, his wife hires Maddie and David to watch over his corpse until it’s cremated, to ensure he can’t fulfill his promise. Does the body escape? Well, let’s

Weary of a life of jelly donuts and Vanna White, Agnes longs for some excitement, some romance, and maybe, just maybe, a cruller instead. Little does she know Maddie's ticket to the Private Investigators' Ball (a Detective Prom minus the DJ playing "Forever Young") gives her all that and more as she is literally swept off her feet in a classic Hitchcock tale of mist

A client—who boasts he has an American Express card, has read Playboy, and has told all the right lies to woo women—asks the Blue Moon Detective Agency to find him the perfect wife, thereby hiring the two most ill-equipped people in matters of relationships to secure him romantic bliss. Within moments Maddie and David are disagreeing on what a "perfect" partner means, e

It's the holidays when Agnes gets the Christmas miracle of someone else's baby left under her tree. Well, hastily dropped in her clothes hamper. It's also a first draft of "Home Alone" when Maddie, David, and Agnes fight off criminals with toys. And it's also a season for good cheer with the arrival of Detective John Munch! Well, Richard Belzer, playing an e

Ever wanted to be your own boss? How about not be a boss at all? Both paths are taken when Maddie sells the Blue Moon Detective Agency and David starts his own investigation service. But will the former duo patch up their differences in time to find a Rolodex—A DOUBLE Rolodex—containing the only record of high-level professional and personal contacts belonging to the boss of &#

It's murder on the art studio floor when a mysterious painting of Maddie—complete with two hideous vases—results in the death of two brothers, the disappearance of the Blue Moon Detective Agency's slim profit margin, and the conclusion that if an artwork is about you then you can legally take it home, free of charge, no matter its crucial role in an ongoing police inves