Bachelor of Hearts

Nov 19 2024 226 ep. 90 mins 70

Bachelor of Hearts Podcast artwork

A perfect Bachelor/ette AU/NZ podcast from Max Quinn & Xavier Rubetzki Noonan.

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200. The Two Hundredth One (Golden Bachelorette S1 E9)

Nov 19 2024 105 mins

We made it - both to the end of another season of The Golden Bachelorette and to the beginning of another hundo! Despite another perfectly-fine-but-not-particularly-inspiring episode, we're celebrating in style. Is Guy a horse? Hear how Joan's season wraps up (you'll never guess!) and also hear us eating a bunch of golden treats on microphone! Sorry! Thanks to all of you for making

199. Did This Help? (Golden Bachelorette S1 E8)

Nov 13 2024 101 mins

We’re licking our wounds this week after a brutal few days in world history, and a Golden Bachelorette: The Men Tell All special that somehow isn’t able to offer any real solutions. But did it help? We’re here to discuss the silver (or is that golden?) linings in this insubstantial but inoffensive hour of TV: for one, it’s nice to see our friends the Mansion Men again and t

198. An ATV Would Fix Me (Golden Bachelorette S1 E7)

Nov 06 2024 100 mins

This week, Joan and her Final Three are treated to a trip to Tahiti, where Joan is faced with a tough decision (which ultimately gets made for her). As we lurch towards the finish line, we discuss the hypothetical possibility of a Golden Who Fucks, and dive deep into the way Tahiti is represented, as well as the effect it has on an older Frenchman. Plus, some hard-hitting US electi

197. Hometown Halloween (Golden Bachelorette S1 E5-6)

Oct 31 2024 125 mins

Happy Hawktuber 31st!!! It's time once again for our annual Halloween episode - this time, we're covering two horrifying episodes Drac-to-Drac, because is there anything scarier than trying to summarise and discuss two feature-length episodes of TV in one go?? Oh yeah - spiders. They're scary as hell. Please support the show on Patreon if you can & would like to, and find us on

196. The Devil's Mimosa (Golden Bachelorette S1 E4)

Oct 17 2024 114 mins

This week on The Golden Bachelorette, the bloodbath continues, as we say farewell to three more of our favourite men (and also another one). Plus, two lacklustre single dates and a bizarre farewell fakeout. Wow, it sounds pretty rough when I put it like that! Never fear, though: we’re feeling our oats this week thanks to our new sponsor, we’re standing up to cancer, and we’re

195. Accessible By Horse (Golden Bachelorette S1 E3)

Oct 11 2024 124 mins

This week, one man is sent on a glitzy all-expenses-paid trip to Las Vegas, whilst another is plonked on a horse. The sixty-somethings are pushed to engage in strenuous activity and many of them are injured in the process, and Joan is struggling under the weight of her performance of ultimate femininity. In conclusion, Episode 3 of The Golden Bachelorette is a land of contrasts. D

194. Nice Try w/ Lauren Guerrera! (FBOY Island AU S2 E9)

Oct 10 2024 76 mins

This week, we're joined once again by LMFAO Expert and girlfriend of the pod Lauren Guerrera to discuss the FBOY Island AU S2 finale! We're still reeling from the very unexpected outcome, but we try our best to decompress and provide some closure after a pretty jarring season finale. There's tons to pull apart from both the finale and the post-show, and we're also a little divided

193. Struck By Lesbians (Golden Bachelorette S1 E2)

Oct 04 2024 88 mins

CANNONBAAALLLL!!! We are back and we're diving deep into Week 2 of our Golden Bachelorette recap! 💦 As the men settle in to mansion life, producers are serving up a heaping dose of Americana with a Very Senior Prom and a trip to Disneyland Resort (brought to you by Disney). We farewell some of our early favourites including Jack and Dr. Bob, but dark horses Charles L., Dan and T

192. Neutral Man Hotel (FBOY Island AU S2 E8)

Sep 29 2024 88 mins

This week, it’s (probably) the second-last episode of the season, and our chickens are finally coming home to roost. We see a Freaky Friday body-swap Group Date, a genuinely thrilling Hot Gay Spy Deal, and another shock walk-out - plus, we get very finicky over spelling, editing, and sound design (all in a day’s work). Who have you got going into the finale? Let us know on soci

191. Runaway Bridle (Golden Bachelorette S1 E1)

Sep 25 2024 91 mins

🥇The Golden Bachelorette is here!🥇 And we are too, like it or lump it, with another series of BoH Presents: Senior Studies. The first-ever episode of The Golden Bachelorete brings us an abundant crop of sexy sexagenarians, each one chock-full of personality, and all of whom are competing for the heart of glamorous private school administrator Joan Vassos. We’re here to tal