Crafting Solutions to Conflict

Nov 20 2024 309 ep. 12 mins 72

Crafting Solutions to Conflict Podcast artwork

Ready for practical and positive perspectives on conflict? Join host Jane Beddall, M.A., J.D., to explore ways to preserve and restore harmony by preventing or limiting conflicts that may damage valued relationships and to effectively resolve those that may occur. We will talk about elephants in the room, expanding pies, the problem with cookie cutters, and much more. If you don’t know what those things mean, you will enjoy learning about them. If you do know them, you will be able to expand your understanding with some new points of view to consider. Would you like to learn more about Jane and her 30-year fascination with conflict, her work as a mediator and a Certified CINERGY® Conflict Coach? Do you have comments or suggestions about a topic or guest? An idea or question about conflict management or conflict resolution? Please visit https://www.dovetailresolutions.com/ or https://www.linkedin.com/in/janebeddall/, or start a conversation at [email protected]!

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Accepting a lousy option

Nov 20 2024 3 mins

When you are truly stuck with a lousy option and need to accept it, what process can you follow?First, acknowledging the frustration. The grief. The loss. Second, trying to keep the finger-pointing and blame to a minimum. Backward-looking “if onlys” don’t help. Third, trying to keep the focus on the future. Whatever that was now going to be. If there were lessons to be learne

Can you or should you "control your emotions"?

Nov 13 2024 4 mins

The idea that we can control our emotions is both unrealistic and potentially damaging. We can try to shut them down or bury them. But they won’t go away. They can corrode or explode. Better to make sure that our emotions do not control us – and our behavior. We can recognize the emotions and their effect on us. Then work to make sure we don’t give up our agency to them.Do yo

The challenge of being humble or gracious

Nov 06 2024 4 mins

It’s good advice to “be humble in victory and gracious in defeat”, a phrase credited to Chrisopher Earle. Humble: no gloating, no mocking. Gracious: accepting the outcome, no blaming those who enforce the rules fairly, no finger pointing at your teammates. But both can be tough to do, especially in the current political climate in the U.S. Which leads to another quote: “If

Empathy, sympathy, and pity

Oct 30 2024 3 mins

Empathy is demonstrating an understanding of another person's feelings and needs. Sympathy shows concern for another person’s misfortune, but not necessarily with the same connection. Pity can be sympathy with judgment or condescension. Empathy can be very helpful in the conflict context. Sympathy may be helpful. Pity can create or worsen problems. We need to be careful about wha

John Ford on The Empathy Set

Oct 23 2024 28 mins

John Ford is a seasoned mediator. He also describes himself as the purveyor of The Empathy Set. These are tools to help answer the fundamental questions that so often lie behind conflict: What are we feeling and what are we needing. The tools include cards, an app, a dictionary and very cool talking sticks. We discuss how to use these tools effectively. To learn more about The Empa

Episode 303: Noticing conflict patterns – location

Oct 16 2024 4 mins

When we are in ongoing relationships, such as those in an extended family or family enterprise, we should be on the lookout for conflict patterns. Is there a pattern to when we frequently end up in a bad conflict? A location can set up challenges in at least three different ways.First, a certain location can be the site of a previous dust-up, disappointment, or even tragedy. Revisi

Noticing conflict patterns – timing

Oct 09 2024 4 mins

When we are in ongoing relationships in an extended family or family enterprise, we should be on the lookout for patterns. Is there a pattern to when we frequently end up in a bad conflict? Which is probably easier to notice than when we don’t end up there.One easy-to-detect factor is timing. Are meetings scheduled at a time of day that is primed for frustration? Are participants

Marking – and even celebrating – progress in disputes and conflicts

Oct 02 2024 5 mins

In the context of a dispute or conflict, we may easily overlook progress. We might miss markers all together. We may see them but dismiss them as no big deal. Baby steps matter. How? First, though they may be only slight improvements, they are improvements. Second, they usually indicate some success in those who are in conflict working together in some small way.Third, marking that

Episode 300 of Crafting Solutions to Conflict

Sep 25 2024 5 mins

Most podcasts don’t last as long as mine. Some recent statistics are available here: Podcastpage.io https://bit.ly/3THcApJ. Why have I been publishing every week for five and a half years?! I think it breaks down to three things.First, understanding conflict and helping people deal with it better is my passion -- and has been for decades. Second, the podcast gives me the opportun

Kristin Keffeler on The Myth of the Silver Spoon

Sep 18 2024 30 mins

Kristin Keffler joins me for this episode. Kristin is the author of The Myth of the Silver Spoon: Navigating Family Wealth & Creating an Impactful Life. We talk about Kristin’s personal, educational, and professional journeys – and how those threads come together to inform her writing and her work today, especially for Rising Gens in financially significant families.Kristin giv