Football Cliches

Mar 31 2025 150 ep. 51 mins 1.6k

Football Cliches Podcast artwork

Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker explore the glorious and unique language of football: the words, the phrases, the mannerisms and, above all, the clichés.

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Free-transfer pundits, Daniel Mann's woodwork nuance & ex-Spurs defenders vs. the Jonas Brothers

Mar 31 2025 43 mins

Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: football pundits available on a free transfer, Big Dan Burn's week becomes a fortnight, a commentator superbly self-policing his woodwork judgment, some unexpected co-commentary during North Macedonia vs Wales, the Maldini/Baresi myth claims a high-profile victim, ex-Spurs defende

”Snuffing out the danger", pre-match strolling & drinking the opposition's water: The listeners' loves & hates

Mar 26 2025 56 mins

Adam Hurrey, Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker entertain this month's listener entries for Mesut Haaland Dicks, as the Clichés faithful nominate their niche footballing fascinations and irritations. Among the selections are the curious tradition of a visiting team's pre-match stroll around the pitch, the reactions of fans behind a goal observed during an action replay, the mora

90/10 tackles, Danish player ratings & how to board a train like a 30-goal striker

Mar 24 2025 49 mins

Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: the ongoing inability of the USA to put together a decent football team, a possible new world record for away fans not realising their team have scored at the opposite end, the Danish media's absurd player-ratings systems and niche player-on-player social media spats. Meanwhile,

Woke metrics, Erling Haaland's Pro Evo name & our niche England predictions

Mar 19 2025 58 mins

Adam Hurrey is joined on the midweek Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and Nick Miller. On the agenda: Erling Haaland's Pro Evo name on Pointless, Wilfried Zaha confronts some modern footballing discourse head-on, Patrik Schick's uniquely selfish attacking statistics this season, a Europa League legend bows out, a pundit finally confronts the "players geeing up the crowd" ep

The Carabao springboard, more musical commentary & the most Richard Keys-sounding tweet of all time

Mar 17 2025 46 mins

Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: the League Cup's modern status as a "springboard" for its winners, Gary Neville stealing Peter Drury's lines, Dan Burn and the "what a week he's having" threshold, the German concept of a "Sunday goal", some beautiful commentary vibrato, and Doncaster's manager on "swings and roun

Knowing your way around the Champions League, German woodwork & England's future one-cap wonders

Mar 12 2025 67 mins

Adam Hurrey is joined on the midweek Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: the near-universal enjoyment of Liverpool vs PSG, second-tier German woodwork noises, some fascinating BBC archive content involving some disgruntled 1970s Match of the Day viewers, the most common object used to explain the offside law and much more. Meanwhile, the panel

The whole 11.2 yards, DNA-level Lampardian Transitions - and Keys & Gray become one

Mar 10 2025 60 mins

Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: a very appropriate Glastonbury slot for one football-adjacent artist, Sky's obsession with Arsenal's 11.2-yard wall at a Manchester United free kick, LinkedIn's latest football breakthrough, a tremendous Footballers’ Names in Things from Down Under, some unacceptable self-co-com

The Pure Discourse XI

Mar 05 2025 84 mins

Adam Hurrey is joined by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker to pick a lineup of players who have provoked the most endless wider debate about their on-pitch roles. The selection process takes in the precise moment a certain type of goalkeeper became brutally obsolete, a stand-out choice at right-back, inverted left-backs, overadventurous centre-backs, England’s infamous "perenn

How to time a red card, penalty run-ups & commentator Robyn Cowen voice-controls a stadium

Mar 03 2025 46 mins

Adam Hurrey is joined on the Adjudication Panel by Charlie Eccleshare and David Walker. On the agenda: some entry-level superlatives for Lionel Messi, Jean-Philippe Mateta and the "if you did that to someone on the street" test, some hugely undignified refereeing body language on the way for 2025/26, some technical issues with declaring "the fastest red card ever", a commentator in

The Football Cliches Quiz XVIII: It Was What It Was

Feb 26 2025 113 mins

The Football Clichés Quiz returns, with the pod aiming to end their dismal run of trivia form against Jonathan Wilson's football history podcast It Was What It Was The questions include: Bundesliga goals of the month, World Cup final equalisers, Englishmen abroad, Hungarian hat-tricks, a man who played against Kevin Keegan AND Cristiano Ronaldo, European clubs’ travel distances