Hallmark Snark

Dec 10 2024 63 ep. 41 mins 42

Hallmark Snark Podcast artwork

Podcast for the #hallmarkies who are also #hallsnarkies. Love is love, even if it’s aggressively heteronormative made-for-tv Christmas love. Join Tara and Austin as they lovingly snark on the Hallmark Countdown to Christmas movie lineup. Instagram/Facebook @HallmarkSnark or visit HallmarkSnark.com

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S6E18 - Week 8 Snark Rankings - Private Princess Christmas, Sugarplummed, Leah’s Perfect Gift

Dec 10 2024 15 mins

In this week’s minisode, we’re ranking Private Princess Christmas, Sugarplummed, and Leah’s Perfect Gift using our scientifically snarky tier system. From “annoyingly good” to “snoozefest,” we’re breaking down the highs, the lows, and everything in between. Brace yourself for some fast and festive judgment. Ready, set, snark! Check out our latest rankings at Hallmar

S6E17 Sugarplummed

Dec 09 2024 48 mins

Well, Hallmark went full meta with Harmony Home and its Sugarplum series. Honestly, we’re rooting for this to become a real franchise and need that rule book published immediately. Hallmark needed to decide if it wanted this to be funny or heartfelt. And while the sugarplum whimsy was delightfully fun, even gin cookies couldn’t make this family believable. We still wish this co

S6E16 - Week 7 Snark Rankings - Joyful Mrs. Miracle, A '90s Christmas, Deck the Walls, Believe in Christmas, Holiday Touchdown: A Chiefs Love Story, The Finnish Line, The Christmas Quest

Dec 06 2024 40 mins

Our "minisode" isn’t so mini this week as we tackle seven movies for Thanksgiving! We’re ranking Debbie Macomber's Joyful Mrs. Miracle, A '90s Christmas, Deck the Walls, Believe in Christmas, Holiday Touchdown: A Chiefs Love Story, The Finnish Line, and The Christmas Quest in our scientifically snarky tier system. From “annoyingly good” to “snoozefest,” we’re here to

S6E15 The Christmas Quest

Dec 06 2024 46 mins

While this was one of the most disappointing treasure hunts we’ve been on, the stunning Icelandic landscapes and views almost made up for it. We’d suggest renaming this movie to "Maybe the Real Treasure Is the Friends and Family We Met Along the Way." While it tried to nod to Indiana Jones and The Da Vinci Code, there’s a reason those movies don’t include a baking montage.

S6E14 - Week 6 Snark Rankings - Christmas on Call, Three Wiser Men and a Boy, To Have and to Holiday

Nov 26 2024 14 mins

Back with another minisode, where we’re ranking this weekend’s holiday movies— Christmas on Call, Three Wiser Men and a Boy, To Have and to Holiday—in our scientifically snarky tier system. From “annoyingly good” to “snoozefest,” we’re here to break down which movies are worth your time, which are just watchable, and which are only good for the snark. Brace yourse

S6E13 Three Wiser Men and a Boy

Nov 25 2024 60 mins

Well shucks. We were annoyed…by how good this was. Can a sequel be better than the original? The Godfather taught us it’s possible, and while this isn’t The Godfather, it’s one of those rare moments where a sequel delivers. Join us as we indulge in a steady diet of sparks—not often found in such abundance in our Countdown to Christmas reviews. We may do a little bit of fa

S6E12 - Week 5 Snark Rankings - Christmas with the Singhs, Jingle Bell Run, Confessions of a Christmas Letter

Nov 21 2024 16 mins

Back with another minisode, where we’re ranking this weekend’s holiday movies— Christmas with the Singhs, Jingle Bell Run, Confessions of a Christmas Letter—in our scientifically snarky tier system. From “annoyingly good” to “snoozefest,” we’re here to break down which movies are worth your time, which are just watchable, and which are only good for the snark. Bra

S6E11 Jingle Bell Run - Nameless Best Snark!

Nov 21 2024 101 mins

Welcome to our first crossover episode with our new snarky friends, Nameless Best Friends. Jingle Bell Run? More like Mildly Festive Plane Trips to Solve Low-Budget Challenges. From walnut cracking to ski valet fruitcake hockey, the thrills were few, but the payout was huge. Sure, the stakes were low, but we stayed for the jackets and Andrew Walker’s center part, which deserved i

S6E10 - BONUS - Hot Frosty

Nov 17 2024 37 mins

We veered off the Hallmark path and straight into Netflix territory for Hot Frosty. Why? For you, for us, for snowmen everywhere. With Lacey Chabert in the mix, it’s basically Hallmark-adjacent. The logic? Utterly absurd—and we couldn’t look away. A snowman, born today years old, can read and talk (but doesn't know all the words). It’s giving Kate & Leopold meets The Kn

S6E9 - Week 4 Snark Rankings - Trivia at St. Nick's, Santa Tell Me, Tis the Season to be Irish

Nov 13 2024 13 mins

Back with another minisode, where we’re ranking this weekend’s holiday movies—Trivia at St. Nick's, Santa Tell Me, Tis the Season to be Irish—in our scientifically snarky tier system. From “annoyingly good” to “snoozefest,” we’re here to break down which movies are worth your time, which are just watchable, and which are only good for the snark. Brace yourself for