Bible Stories for Blasphemers

Dec 10 2024 64 ep. 64 mins

Bible Stories for Blasphemers Podcast artwork

A weekly story-telling comedy podcast looking at the Bible as a wild collection of myths and legends, as told by a queer ex-vangelical to a secular cult survivor.

Comedy Arts Religion & Spirituality

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Idle Idols

Dec 10 2024 56 mins

Happy upload day, blasphemers!This week we introduce Micah, one of the last judges! Also explore topics of idols, and live-in priests! And in this week's Pop Corner, camp counselor Dan tells us all about the pagan god Pan!Special thanks to Henry Rogland for our intro, and to Bird Creek for our theme song, "Hooky With Sloane." Edited and Mixed by Everett Kemper (@everettkemper)Hoste

Samson & Delilah

Nov 26 2024 70 mins

Howdy folks!An eye for an eye sure does make the whole world blind. And that proverb couldn't be proven more true than in this episode where Samson gets crossed and things get wild!Special thanks to Henry Rogland for our intro, and to Bird Creek for our theme song, "Hooky With Sloane." Edited and Mixed by Everett Kemper (@everettkemper)Hosted by Dan Rogland & Mariah Wren (@mari

Out of the Eater Came Something to Eat

Nov 12 2024 68 mins

Hello, dear listeners!This week we introduce characters Samson and Delilah, get some child rearing advice from an angel, and see some Captain America level log (lion) ripping!Special thanks to Henry Rogland for our intro, and to Bird Creek for our theme song, "Hooky With Sloane." Edited and Mixed by Everett Kemper (@everettkemper)Hosted by Dan Rogland & Mariah Wren (@mariahmayc

Lesbians Are Immortal

Oct 29 2024 53 mins

Hello blasphemers! In this episode we look into the life and times of another judge named Jephthah.And also come across what may be the bible's first gay character??Special thanks to Henry Rogland for our intro, and to Bird Creek for our theme song, "Hooky With Sloane." Edited and Mixed by Everett Kemper (@everettkemper)Hosted by Dan Rogland & Mariah Wren (@mariahmaycats) Follo

Divine Right

Oct 18 2024 79 mins

Hello Blasphemers!Apologies for the late upload on this episode. The next episode will be up Wednesday 10/30 per the usual schedule.In this episode, we dive into Chapter 9 of the Book of Judges! Abimelech, son of Gideon, isn't so humble as his father, and craves power of his own. Will he attain it? Listen to find out!Also in this week's Pop Corner, it's all about Lord of the Rings,

March of the 300

Sep 10 2024 57 mins

Happy Episode Day, blasphemers!This week, Dan regales us the tale of Gideon's 300 and their pursuit of Zebah, Zalmunna and their 15,000 Midianites.Also in this week's Computer Room segment, Everett the Engineer talks with our hosts about the link between Neopets and the church of Scientology!Special thanks to Henry Rogland for our intro, and to Bird Creek for our theme song, "Hooky

An Army of Various Ites

Aug 20 2024 59 mins

Gather round Campers, 'cause your fave bible camp counselors are back! Dan managed to break his wrist just after recording this, so we had to take a short break, but now it's time to get back to REAL business: Bible. In this one we teach you survival skills you'll take with you for the rest of your life. Such as... the best methods in which to drink water from a river; How to terri

He Did the Dew

Jul 30 2024 54 mins

Dia duit, heathens! Camp Counselor Mariah is back from Ireland, so go ahead and help yourself to your favorite non-bigoted pickle chicken and settle in for another installment of The Bible! This week Dan teaches us about a Judge called Gideon. He’s a skeptic icon and almost certainly was the first guy to ever Science. You can’t prove he wasn’t. Then be sure to stick around fo

Damn, Deborah.

Jul 17 2024 54 mins

*in the voice of Julie Andrews*Dearest Gentle Listener,Now, you didn't think we'd forgotten to maintain our ongoing commitment to providing you Patreon content content, did you? Well, worry not little lamb, your shepherds haven't forgotten you. In this episode you can look forward to such delights as thus, as well as the story of the only female judge in the Book of Judges. This is

Evil World Peace

Jul 03 2024 56 mins

Blessings upon all ye blasphemers, for we are back from summer vacation!!! This is one of the BEST Bible stories we've gotten to cover so far as we continue in the Book of Judges with the stories of Othniel, Ehud, and also Shamgar was there. Most of the time we focus on the story of Ehud and his diabolical scheming, and how he secures victory for Israel. In the pop corner we talk a