Discount Storytime

Mar 09 2025 49 ep. 20 mins 9
Discount Storytime Podcast artwork

Weekly stand-alone humorous short stories for grown-ups, with engaging plots, rich character development, and intelligent dialogue carefully edited out.  Enjoy! 

  Fiction
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The Vengeance Hungry Caterpillar

Mar 09 2025 23 mins  
What happens when two little caterpillars come across a deadly enemy? Also, episodes now include a "Discount Idea" and I read fan mail! Our Sponsor for today is Grandpa Old Timey's Cornmeal (flavored product). CONTENT WARNING: Profanity, Violence, Body Horror, Gore Enjoy! Sound Effects by freesound_community from Pixabay Music: "Skinny Food Fighters Blues 85" by Won Jong Hwa from P

Moby Dick: the Western!

Mar 02 2025 19 mins  
Our team of Discount Storytime Explorers found a long lost script for Moby Dick, initially written as a radio drama Western! Enjoy the never heard before performance of this classic tale! Our sponsor for today is Bland-O's cereal, made with real water chestnuts! Enjoy! Content Warning: Profanity, Gunshots, Gun Violence Music: "Skinny Food Fighters Blues 85" by Won Jong Hwa from Pix

Ad Space

Feb 23 2025 32 mins  
Across the galaxy, Captain Argus faces a survival challenge on a hostile planet, armed with little more than his wits and a stash of Taco Bell gift cards. His encounter with a Zambar Legion spaceship presents a thrilling twist and the possibility of rescue. However, is all what is seems? (Usually this means 'no'.) Our sponsor is "Sorceress on the Set" documentary. Find more stories

Beauty and the Torture Librarian

Feb 16 2025 30 mins  
What happens when Della is thrown into the torture dungeon for refusing to marry the evil King Blaine? Content Warning: Profanity, References to torture and body horror. Music: "Skinny Food Fighters Blues 85" by Won Jong Hwa from Pixabay Backing tracks for "Be Our Guest" and "Beauty and the Beast" provided by Karaoke-Version.com "Send Coffee a message" If this made you laugh, pleas

MultiverSEquels

Feb 09 2025 22 mins  
Hold onto your seats, dear listeners, because I read comics to my kids for the first time! And it is so exciting and not made up at all! Our sponsor today is the upcoming 17-hour film 'Wuthering Bottoms.' Enjoy! Content warning for profanity. Sound Effects by freesound_community from Pixabay Music: "Skinny Food Fighters Blues 85" by Won Jong Hwa from Pixabay “superhero theme” b

Cookie Cabana

Feb 02 2025 24 mins  
Have you ever wondered what might want from a small beachside bakery? Join us for a thrilling tale at Cookie Cabana, where Mandy and Barry find themselves in the midst of an unexpected heist led by a trio of blue-furred, feather-adorned robbers. Our sponsor for today is the new business book "The Extortionist's Guide to Success." Enjoy Content Warning: profanity, gunshots, gun viol

Update: Scaling Back for Quality

Jan 29 2025 2 mins  
Hello Listeners. A while back the show went to twice weekly, and unfortunately, I've felt a drop in quality while trying to maintain that schedule. You deserve better than that! Discount Storytime will return to publishing every Monday, and will be adding back in the commercials, music, sound effects, and most importantly, one fuller story, rather than two 'filler' stories each wee

Dinner Talk

Jan 26 2025 12 mins  
In this story I answer what millions of listeners seem to want to know most, what is dinner conversation like at my home? Enjoy! Content warning for profanity. Music: "Skinny Food Fighters Blues 85" by Won Jong Hwa from Pixabay "Send Coffee a message" If this made you laugh, please consider leaving a tip at: buymeacoffee.com/discountstorytime My contact information: email: mail@dis

Sewage Monster Vows

Jan 22 2025 15 mins  
What happens when a minor car accident on your wedding day introduces you to a sewage-dripping creature that knows nothing about human life? Content warning for profanity. Music: "Skinny Food Fighters Blues 85" by Won Jong Hwa from Pixabay "Send Coffee a message" If this made you laugh, please consider leaving a tip at: buymeacoffee.com/discountstorytime My contact information: ema

The Goose Translator

Jan 19 2025 13 mins  
What if understanding goose honks could change a family's destiny? Will my cousin Peggy's quirky major in goose lexicology, once the subject of her parents' jokes, becomes the hero of our story? Listen and find out. Music: "Skinny Food Fighters Blues 85" by Won Jong Hwa from Pixabay "Send Coffee a message" If this made you laugh, please consider leaving a tip at: buymeacoffee.com/d